Let me give you an example. Through the day, as I face events in my daily life, I remember things I have done and said in the past that are related to the present. I cringe at the memory of them. Secretly, I have interpreted my reaction as one of guilt for having done the wrong thing. But as I have observed my reaction carefully, objectively, I observe that guilt is a mischaracterization of my reaction and that is why forgiveness of self by myself or by others has had no effect.
Following the sensations of my reactions objectively, I observe that the sensations are really an expression of my dislike of making mistakes or imperfect gestures. In fact, my reactions are reactions of ego. As my attention penetrates my reactions without the false interpretation of guilt, I become more free of them and I observe that I am less affected by people and events that challenge my competence. I laugh at my foibles more easily and feel less pressure to perform perfectly. This change arises from observation, not effort or analysis.
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January 23, 2022
Tags: imperfect gestures, observation, sensations, work on self